Sweet you rock and sweet you roll. Or, thoughts on the 78th Academy Awards. Or, no Brokeback joke, I promise. Or, who rigs every Oscar night?
Before the ceremony, I told Heather that I'd burn Los Angeles if Crash won Best Picture. Not that I've always agreed with the Academy voters, or that it hasn't been a celebration of mediocrity for a really long time, but because it's not even a token attempt at rewarding excellence. In fact, it's LA provincialism at its worst.
I admit, out of the Best Picture noms, I've only seen Brokeback and Crash, but I can say that Brokeback is a really, really, really, really good movie while Crash was, while entertaining enough, was either a really well done bad movie or a bad movie trying really hard to be good. Or as Bomani Jones puts it, if you thought Crash was a "great" film, you need to get a library card. Which is to say, it shouldn't have been nominated in the first place. At best, it's the weakest film in the category. Probably. I'm sure Munich and Good Night and Good Luck were at least good without any qualifications.
And despite the Brokeback buzz, there really was no consensus winner so the "good" movies canceled each other out. But here's the thing - as good-bad (or bad-good) as Crash was, it was an LA movie. And who are the majority of Academy voters?
Yep, Angelinos. Like, you know how we get all provincial about New York shit? I think LA's worse. Not that I'd know. I wouldn't go to the fucking hellhole (Lies, lies. He spent a weekend with a friend in Irvine -ed). But they seem to think freeways and Starbucks and the Lakers are somehow cool. At least when we get snobby about New York, we point out the good shit - apartment rooftops, 24-hour pizza, the size of subway rats.
But the Academy done gone up and gave the Best Picture Oscar to fucking Crash. Someone get me a blowtorch and a roundtrip ticket to LAX. Burn Hollywood burn. So that's how I feel about Best Picture. Can't say I'm surprised, and I wasn't rooting for Gayback Mountain or anything, but that doesn't mean Academy voters aren't a bunch of poopoofaces.
Rest of the my Oscar thoughts in bullet points:
tags: Academy Awards Oscars Crash