Thursday, January 05, 2006

College Football: Strike a pose, there's nothing to it

I don't usually post about college football (other than to post about how I don't post about college ball), mostly because I don't watch it that much. For one thing, I went to school at the University of North Carolina, where a televised game was essentially background noise for a Saturday afternoon spent drinking macrobrew from a can, or a trip to Kenan (a lovely stadium, btw) to see which sororities wore the shortest skirts and discuss which cheerleader's thighs we didn't mind being crushed to death by - neither of which was much fun after October, of course

But the past 3 nights, I have found myself unable to turn away from the surprisingly entertaining bowl season, culminating with the oddly satisfying victory by Texas over the way, way, way over-hyped Trojans.

Yes, oddly satisfying, because I dislike almost everything that comes out of Texas, like George W. Bush, Paul Wall, Jessica Simpson, Dallas Cowboys, Matthew McConaughey and referring to beef brisket as "BBQ". And because Mack Brown is still a douche for the way he left Chapel Hill.

Yet I found myself rooting for the Longhorns, or rather, rooting against USC. It's simple, really. For one thing, USC reminds me of Duke, practically gushing with a sense of entitlement, albeit with a more attractive student body. And the hype leading up to the game was ridiculous - Slate's Jonathan Chait rightfully called out ESPN for the premature and suffocating "greatest ever" talk. Did ESPN forget about what happened to Miami when they went into the championship game as #1 vs Ohio State (2004) and Alabama (1993)?

And once the game started, how couldn't a neutral fan not root for Texas? Vince Young, Vince Young, Vince Young. That was some crazy Michael Jordan Flu Game shit, or at least some Tommy Frazier Sugar Bowl shit - it was clear from very early on that we were watching a classic in the making. You didn't sense that? While Bush only showed moments of flash, Young was the show (though Leinart and White weren't half bad either). We have no idea how his skill sets translate to the pro game, but I just can't see anyone in the college game stopping him right now. And you'll have to forgive his Heisman-posing at the trophy presentation, especially when you consider Leinart's post-game "We're the better team" comment and putting the blame on his defense.

All right, that's it for college football until next January, but some quick shots:
  • All this bowl-watching meant I missed Monday's Arrested Development, which will be pulled from Fox after four more episodes. At least Tony Hale has those somewhat entertaining but entirely too repetitive Citibank commercials.

    Update: Holy crap, that was a fucking awesome episode.

  • I'd say something about how Talib Kweli's Big 10 rap is better than anything off The Beautiful Struggle, but I've already made the same joke about Mos Def's GMC Envoy Denali commercial. Though this spot is an improvement over the sanctimonious "Big 10 sets the example" one that aired throughout the season, why is a Brooklyn MC rhyming about a conference of Midwest schools?

    Let's think here - Chicago has Kanye (I guess the anti-higher education message won't go so well), Common (maybe) or Twista (um...). Michigan has Eminem (oops). There's Atmosphere from Minnesota, which is great if they want to promote some book learnin' but that's just a little too nerdy. So how about Cleveland's own Bone Thugs 'N Harmony? Wouldn't they be perfect, considering Ohio State's thug image? What says "Big 10 athletics" better than "Cash your checks and come on"?

    Okay fine, Talib Kweli it is.

  • Okay, maybe a little more college ball. Bobby Bowden has always had poor game management skills, pretty staggering for such a successful coach, but the dude just might be losing it. Did you see him almost walk off the field and shake the state trooper's hand after Penn State missed what would have been a game-ending field goal?

  • In any case, it's always satisfying to watch Florida State lose. Always.

  • Speaking of game management, not a particularly good display by either Mack Brown (who's always been mediocre on gameday) or Pete Carroll (I mean, calling a timeout before a 2-point conversion attempt that would still have USC in a position to tie with a field goal).

  • It's kinda fun to see ABC promoting Jake In Progress starring John Stamos like it's a new show and it wasn't a widely ignored midseason replacement last year.

  • If I don't see Laura Quinn on TV again, it will be 85 times too many.

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